Pause and Wonder

April 2, 2013

I’ve been away for awhile….away from the internal space that allows me to write on my blog. I felt as if I was lost in a twirling within my heart and mind, and had a hard time slowing it down. Until now. If anyone is still checking in, thank you.

Pause and Wonder

pause between breaths

I was reading a post by Brother David Steindle-Rast about how our perspective changes if we can find wonder and surprise in more things. From the moment we open our eyes in the morning, we have the opportunity to choose to be inspired by the wonder that surrounds us. Beginning with the sound of the alarm clock. Imagine if our response to that sound was not agitation and anxiety, but wonder: wow! Listen to that sound! It is calling me to be ALIVE!!

We are waking up to surprise!! And every moment of the day will offer us more surprises to take our breath away and fill us with wonder. If. If we can be awake, aware and alert!

http://www.gratefulness.org/readings/dsr_awake.htm

As I read the article I also thought of the quote above. If we can train ourselves to pause, as in the moments between breaths, we can use those moments to learn to see the surprise and wonder all around us. Perhaps this will provide us with the possibility of seeing more things as opportunities for ourselves, rather than burdens that have to be surmounted.

How would this change our lives? How would we be different? Would we be different?

2013

2013 is around the corner. With it’s arrival comes the opportunity (a favorable or advantageous circumstance or combination of circumstances) for a fresh start. If you want to choose that path.

The tradition of making a New Year’s resolution is 4,000 years old! Ancient Babylonians made promises to start the New Year off on the right foot in order to earn the favor of the Gods. The “New Year” wasn’t always observed in January because a month called “January” didn’t always exist! It originally was the Spring Equinox celebration. Spring being a natural time to think of fresh starts, beginning anew. Throughout history different “leaders” have changed it from one date to another. Many religions and cultures still celebrate a different date for the New Year.

I think many of us would chuckle thinking about resolutions we have made and kept! My record isn’t very good!

However, this year it really struck me what the potential might be, if we could make changes that would provide a fresh start to parts of our lives. What if we took advantage of this quaint custom and did turn it into an opportunity?

Recent events have led many of us to reevaluate all kinds of things. Personally I found myself thinking deeply about living more in the present and letting go of past angers, disappointments, and focusing more on simply being kind.

While I still hope to “give up” a few things, I have decided to focus on “doing”.

My priority this year is to be kind. In big ways and small ways.

“Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”

Dalai Lama

aesop kindness

I don’t think there is a skill to being kind. It’s in all of us. It may be buried, or other responses and actions might be stronger, but it is in us.

I have been working on kindness a little bit this year. I have had some successes, but many more surprises.  I am always surprised how quickly I respond with frustration to things beyond my control. That frustration is a form of anger. I can feel my body change when it surfaces. When my body changes because my mind changes, it all becomes a spiral of downward momentum. Then I have a difficult time getting free from it.

Hand in hand with being kind comes being present and being in the here and now, not in the past or future. And that is even harder. I carry disappointments, frustrations, worries from work home with me every day. Sometimes it takes me days to digest them and let them go. I am always thinking and planning one step ahead so I am “prepared”. How can that be bad? Being prepared? But somehow it does fuel the anxiety. If I am being kid to myself, which is the first step to be kind to others, why do I worry, become anxious over things that I have managed to take care of for years and know they are not a big deal? Is it all in the wording……the wording my mind chatter loops endlessly around in my head? Why can’t it just be: “I will stop at the grocery store.”, rather than: “I have to stop at the grocery.”  Have to, have to, have to, have to. I will focus on making statements with little or no value regarding things that are……no good or bad, no judgement. Just a fact. By adding the word “have” it becomes a chore or burden.

So I will focus on being present in this one moment. I will be kind, kinder, kindly. I will begin with myself. I will change the mind chatter in my head. I will reach out to others and simply be kind. This is a New Year, a fresh start. I have this opportunity to start over, and allow the kindness that is already inside of me be stronger and more present.

try kindness